Help Kenneth Save for School

Colors that don't exist in nature. . .

What the hell is this? Seriously? I don't think there's a natural color anywhere in this photo. Why would you walk around with your granny panties on your head, and look so proud about it?

Facial hair. . . again?

Here's a free pattern to knit yourself your very own beard hat. I'd suppose the a pattern for bikini bottoms come next. Brought to you by our friends at www.instructables.com.

OH MY GOD

I borrowed this from the website http://www.craftastrophe.com/. I am quite good at cross stitch - I learned how to do it when I was about 8 years old. But, I've never managed to get quite this good. Someone done raised the bar on me!

You knew this was coming. . .

It was only a matter of time until taxidermy hit this page. These squirrels and stoats were supposedly part of a marketing campaign for a Scottish brewery called BrewDogs. The brew and er. . . victims sold for 500 pounds each. Its difficult to imagine why any company would want to use taxidermied stoats, squirrels and hares for their marketing campaign, or why anyone would even want to kill and stuff animals in the first place. Perhaps in Europe or Kentucky people have a different opinion of what's acceptable, but frankly, I'm confounded as to why this was a good marketing campaign, who thought it up, and further, who would carry this idea to fruition.

These sold though, and some taxidermist made a hefty profit. I looked up the company blamed for this monstrosity at www.brewdog.com, and they didn't showcase this particular line of brew. In any event, we all know what PT Barnum had to say. . .

Its The Thought That Counts...

Art is from heaven, mediocrity is from hell. A filet crochet wolf howling at the moon, hung in a hallway is from beyond hell.

This piece, from a crocheter's standpoint is just horrendous. It is unblocked, lopsided, hung in the cheesiest of all places and just horrible. "My mom made it for a friend of hers at Xmas" THE LOOKS tells us. Some friend.

As if that wasn't bad enough, take a look at the headless doll in the lower left hand corner. . . oh wait, maybe its hiding. . . and the needlepoint art work hung on the right side. Hung way too high, and its even worse than the wolf image.

For only $80.00, you too can own this masterpiece, and it can be customized. Find it at http://www.etsy.com/.

Who let the dogs out?

Why should the cats get all the fun? With this rat hat, you can humiliate your dog too! That is, unless the cat and dog are friends and are willing to share.

This lovely pattern which your canine pal is sure to treasure can be found on www.ravelry.com.

The Cat In A Hat

How pissed is this cat? Does anyone think the cat cares that the beret matches its eyes? Just how long do you think the kitty will wear this thing until it shreds it to bits?

I could just imagine if this cat got away and the owners went looking for it. They'd say, "Has anyone seen my cat? It was gray. Oh, and it was wearing a green beret."

I could only imagine why it ran away.

A lip warmer. . .

I don't get it. Could you just imagine opening your birthday present and finding this little beauty? Maybe Aunt Bunny knit you this 'stache because you told her how much you liked hers. But, Aunt Bunny didn't recognize sarcasm much. Look closely, and you will see this moustache comes complete with its own ear attachments to keep it in place, because a crooked moustache could be embarrassing. I found this bad boy featured on Instructables, and if you want to create one yourself, here is the pattern. www.instructables.com/Knitted-Moustache/. Knit away!

The Womb

The womb is not pretty says MK Carroll. Really? I say. Well then, why did you find it pretty enough to knit your very own womb?

I have no idea what was the inspiration for anyone to design, much less take the time to knit such an anatomically yucky thing. I don't know what else to add here, but, why, oh why would anyone take the time to make one of these things, and who the heck would want one of these? Nonetheless, should you feel so inclined to knit your very own womb, baby not included, you may find the pattern on www.knitty.com.